I don't know for how long I can go on like this.
The weather isn't helping either. It's too fricking cold inside (worse outside obviously) the house to do anything except lie under the duvet with layers of clothes, a hoodie and another jumper. My food provider dah balik kampung dia untuk exam, so everyday I have to think about what to eat (Fatimah pun sedih dah takde makanan bila datang rumah). I go on Facebook to cool down by looking at friends' and families' pictures and walls. But then I get updates on the various profane public expressions of love between married (and non-married) couples who funnily enough find joy and pleasure through showing off and annoying other people (seb baik dah pandai buang diorang dari updates).
I think everybody's exhausted to the limit already and are on the verge of mental collapse.
These last few weeks will determine everything. All the hard work in school (tipu la tu hard work), college and 4 1/2 years of university will be tested in these last few weeks. And if things go wrong, imagine how wasteful all those years of tears and sweat were. I shouldn't have worked so hard back then; I should have done a simpler degree, gotten a good-paying job and enjoy a wonderful and fulfilling life instead. I don't know if it's worth it anymore.
I know I can tell other people that it's near the end of the road already. But the end seems so near yet it actually is so so far. I don't have enough motivation or perseverance to do these last few miles.
The weather isn't helping either. It's too fricking cold inside (worse outside obviously) the house to do anything except lie under the duvet with layers of clothes, a hoodie and another jumper. My food provider dah balik kampung dia untuk exam, so everyday I have to think about what to eat (Fatimah pun sedih dah takde makanan bila datang rumah). I go on Facebook to cool down by looking at friends' and families' pictures and walls. But then I get updates on the various profane public expressions of love between married (and non-married) couples who funnily enough find joy and pleasure through showing off and annoying other people (seb baik dah pandai buang diorang dari updates).
I think everybody's exhausted to the limit already and are on the verge of mental collapse.
These last few weeks will determine everything. All the hard work in school (tipu la tu hard work), college and 4 1/2 years of university will be tested in these last few weeks. And if things go wrong, imagine how wasteful all those years of tears and sweat were. I shouldn't have worked so hard back then; I should have done a simpler degree, gotten a good-paying job and enjoy a wonderful and fulfilling life instead. I don't know if it's worth it anymore.
I know I can tell other people that it's near the end of the road already. But the end seems so near yet it actually is so so far. I don't have enough motivation or perseverance to do these last few miles.
8 comments:
IKR!!!!!!?????
I almost died when I the OSCE allocations came out. It has become too real!!! Haha, sounds like there's something wrong here.
huhu... stay cool uti. i went through the same thing only a few months back.
but the day you get the degree, you'll look back and say everything was definitely worth it.
you will do great,i know...kan best student ;p
oh by the way, please grad n come back to terengganu for my wedding :)
Munzir, I don't know if moving on to work in a shitty working environment after graduation makes it worthwhile.
Lily, zaman skoloh dokleh kira. Masuk college je, all of it goes out the window. But I'll try hard, I have two weddings to manage! Cewah!
btul2,zaman skoloh tu mmg r, aku pun rs aku rajin terlampau and was an excellent student, mcm tk caye..hahhaha
"I should have done a simpler degree, gotten a good-paying job and enjoy a wonderful and fulfilling life instead."
Sometimes I wonder the same thing.
thank you for saying..."I should have done a simpler degree, gotten a good-paying job and enjoy a wonderful and fulfilling life instead."......
i thought i was d only one thinking like that... but now ade org lain gak....
LETS START A CLUB!!!
n by the way... u dah jadi DR ZAAAATTTIILLLLLL dahhh yahoo!
Post a Comment